"Some women have become ball-breakers," says Francine Kaye, known professionally as The Divorce Doctor, with an eponymous website."It's not entirely our fault, because the demands of the workplace have changed us, and brought out our more masculine side."We end up labelling our men lazy, because they have to be told what to do and nagged into doing it, but the truth is, we have pushed them to the point where they are afraid to take the initiative, because they feel they can never get anything right." Kaye's views chime with a growing mood of concern about a worrying imbalance in 21st-century relationships.In her controversial book Save the Males: Why Men Matter, Why Women Should Care published earlier this year, American columnist Kathleen Parker decried the fact that men were suffering a crisis of identity as a result of the conflicting and often confusing messages the receive from women and society, which very often make men feel irrelevant.British men came third, after Swedes and Norwegians, in an international egalitarian index.
A new survey by Oxford University has revealed that women are attracted to men they believe will help out with household chores and childcare."The unfashionable truth is that men and women are different," says Kaye, author of The Divorce Doctor, who works with couples trying to save their relationships, as well as couples and individuals who are set on splitting up and want to do so amicably. The same generally goes for "Who is more aspirational? "Men are shocked when they see the results of the test," says Kaye."Male and female employees might be interchangeable in the office, but at home, couples – and women in particular – need to acknowledge, respect and indeed celebrate their differences, otherwise men feel sidelined and retreat into themselves." When Kaye examines the traits that each partner displays, she routinely finds that in many couples the traditional female and male attributes are completely reversed. "But interestingly, they don't seem to mind so much that they have female characteristics; they're far more appalled that their wives have so many male characteristics, because that's what effectively emasculates them.Other incidents recorded include offerings of disinterred skulls to Inuits, the 55-year-old sail maker who served in the Navy at Trafalgar and the Army at Waterloo, and the second mate who was lost overboard with the ship's keys in his hand.Another surgeon was asked to observe Samuel Tapper, an 18-year-old sailor in 1802, and noted: “Tapper’s breasts so perfectly resemble those of a young woman of 18 or 19 that even the male genitals which are also perfect, do not fully remove the imporession that the spectateor is not lookin on a female.” He was returned to active duty while in January 1802 one James Calloway, a seaman aged 40, fell overboard and was only revived when tobacco smoke was blown into his lungs.